20 10 2007

the year that was.

if i were to write a book, my twenty-seventh year would take most of the pages…  ive experienced some major transformation, from spiritual beliefs to convictions where life is concerned.

this year, i learned that it is just as important to take care of myself as it is to take care of other people.

i was so focused with my career that my life took a turn to the worse… i got rushed to the hospital (almost near death, or so i thought it was)… the doctors found nothing wrong and ruled out i have this anxiety “thing”. for weeks, i was under medication — took depressants to stabilize my condition… i couldnt go out alone, for i was too scared i might just stop breathing and die on the spot. i saw a shrink who told me it was mind over matter, but how could she know if she doesnt even know how it feels.

a few days ago, i met a wise man, whose surname would command the utmost respect of the country’s richest of the rich. we were both invited as speakers for the ecology event of this school in Antipolo.  He was sharing with us his life, how he’s blessed, and how he gives back the glory by telling people to just leave everything to God. He talked about natural healing so I asked him the cure for anxiety.  “Trust God wholeheartedly,” he said — and i understood.

It’s weird but God really has His way of telling us to stop doing the foolish things that we do.

Let me share a message from a friend:

Sometimes, God breaks our spirit to save our soul… Sometimes, He breaks our heart to make us whole… Sometimes, He sends us pain so we can be stronger… Sometimes, He sends us failures so we can be humble… Sometimes, he sends us illness so we can take better care of ourselves… Sometimes, He takes everything away from us so we can learn the value of everything we have…

So dare to trust Him completely in all.

im blessed. 

I’m still here.  And slowly, Im trying to redeem myself, to start being the much nicer person i once was.  Now, i turned twenty-eight and we had but a simple celebration at home… my family’s complete.  My friends greeted me, and one of my closest friends dropped by (we just moved, nobody knows where I live now, and I havent been telling my friends about our new place either, just this one). 

Brought me a little present —  a book on watercolors… as if my twentyeighth will be painted with love in warm colors, the way i wanted my canvas to be. 

this i pray…

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2 responses

22 10 2007
Ninette

Hi Iva!

Happy birthday, girl!

I’ve been following up your blog post. I was quite surprised you were sick pala. Very happy that you are on the road to recovery.

Cheer up. As you have said, there’s more to life and be thankful for.

Wishing you well and hoping this year will be a better one for you and your family.

22 10 2007
iva

thanks, ninette.. mwahz 🙂 sundin ko yung advice mo.. lagay ko sa wishlist ko.. hahhaa…

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